Publishing it [...1.4s] online, we're gonna publish it. Hi, welcome to our YouTube channel, I'm Spencer, [...0.6s] I'm Josh, and this is the yet unnamed, yet decided, yet to be edited podcast, but we know it's not a throwing. We have two episode, two topics in this episode, one of them is tofu pudding and the other one is something to do with autism.They go together because they're both tasty or both gelatinous, they're both acquired tastes, they're both [...0.6s] acquired taste tofu pudding, I have not, [...0.8s] don't know about this nature versus nurture. Did you, Jeff to nurture the pudding a lot? It is a nurture. Do you know autism is mostly genetic at this point?Okay, we have tracked that down. Okay, interesting. Well, I say we start with the puddings, so, um, [...0.4s] hi, this is the first time I've cooked since I got back. Welcome, where'd you, where you back from? Um, I was in Prague working, um, I do work occasionally. I know, shocking.Yeah. The number he was like, I just got back from Prague. It was a work trip. It was just so, so much [...0.4s] the jet lag. It's just like, I'm so jet set. And it's just, it's so hard to like travel and then like come back and then be in like a different zone because I'm just in a like evolved European culture and then I come back to a potato for a president and I'm not quite sure what's happening there.There is a very real, [...0.4s] uh, [...0.7s] sense of, I guess you can almost call it dysphoria, uh huh, between like being in Europe and being here.Yeah. So the last two work trips I took were Stockholm and Prague, both of which are, [...1.4s] hmm, I think socialist is actually a good way to describe it. They both have really good safety nets.Um. Both cities were not so insanely crowded like a New Yorker Tokyo. They have like a much more [...0.5s] somehow metered approach to, uh like the way people are spaced.Especially Prague. Um. Prague had a lot of cool little green spaces with wildflowers growing. Like not everything was mode, um, which was nice. And people were, um, I don't know, I think the people in the factory were very, like, [...0.7s] they were pretty happy and nice. Some people, uh, did have a bit of that.I think in America we tend to do Eastern Europe as a bit, uh, it's for the dark [...0.9s] kind of place, like you know, communism was there. Like the mood is a bit more [...0.4s] somber than we might be used to. Um, I felt a little bit of that. But overall it was really beautiful and a really fun trip. I I, my traveling to Europe has been [...0.8s] limited by that.I mean non existent. And but when I think about how Americans stack up against the global culture, in my perspective, Americans are seen as the loud, bubbly, hyper joyous, very expressive [...0.4s] individuals.And so if you meet somebody who's a little bit more reserved, maybe that's actually the statistical medium of outgoingness. Could be, could be hard to say true. But there's also, I think [...1.5s] it just seems like a better, [...1.0s] like a more fair culture overall.I don't feel [...1.1s] as much. [...1.4s] I'm sure there's a wealth gap, it just doesn't seem as big and as, uh, [...0.8s] stinky. And I think, um, [...0.6s] this is a hard one. Stockholm, for sure felt more racially welcoming to [...0.6s] all kinds of people. Like I didn't really feel like I work in factories.So [...0.5s] it's, it's a pretty specific dynamic. Like you know, not everyone, it's a pretty good mix of people who are like operators who may not have the best education or me, [...0.7s] uh you know, be immigrants. Uh, then there's also like engineers who tend to be more educated but could also be immigrants.Um, but there just wasn't a feeling of a racial divide quite as much as I feel here. Yeah, and by the way, here is Michigan, Detroit or suburbs of Detroit. In Detroit, I think the black and white dividing line is very, [...1.2s] uh, [...1.0s] pronounced.I'm going to comment on that when I've had more to drink one day to move on to puddings, because you both black and white puddings, and I definitely have black opinions on that one.So, um, [...0.7s] I, oh, just pick the whole tray, get the whole tray during the whole tray. Wait, there's, like other stuff on that.That's fine. Um, so this is a recipe from Instagram, and, like, shout out to at somebody will put you in the comments. You know, it's one of those I follow a few of the vegan ish ones, and this is a bowl of ranch, good because I love it is not I love ranch, so this one is from, this is a Reese's pudding.It's, these are both tofu based puddings, [...0.9s] and [...0.6s] this one came from a recipe [...0.4s] that, like, it just seems like every vegan recipe is like this now it's [...0.9s] nice looking Gen Z [...1.5s] girl woman [...1.1s] style super bland, like you know, the black and beige, [...0.7s] um, very typical Gen Z, and the tone is exactly [...0.7s] guys, this tofu pudding is vegan, [...0.5s] gluten free and high protein.It's gonna help you get all your macros to pitch the camera, right, and it is so good, it's so creamy and so easy.Just take however much tofu, put it in the blender with peanut butter, [...0.5s] and then like, some, it's always some bullshit artificial sweetener like agave syrup and maple syrup. And you're like, there's no way this is gonna taste good.It's gonna taste like [...0.4s] tofu, like uh um, but this one demonetized that, we're six minutes in order. Oh good job, Joshua. Well, we can, we can cut that out. Um, so this one actually had peanut butter in it, which I think is a good, like a strong enough flavor that it would counteract the tofu.Um, and I do love Reese's, and I did feel like making something, so there you have, there it is back from Prague, and we're making tofu pudding, so I have a very strong relationship with pudding.Hmm, I hate Jello, cannot stand Jello, [...0.5s] but I love pudding, get to go get something. Yeah, I forgot an ingredient, but I'm actually out of salt. It needs salt on it.This could be actually we did have dinner earlier. There was no salt in the food and it was [...1.0s] markedly less tasty. Haha, I'm like, I think I'm a fairly decent cook and I know how to make things and I'm pretty good at salting. Yeah um, I'm, [...0.4s] everyone who eats with me knows that I oversalt everything.True, or I'd use a Liberal amount of salt and this definitely needs salt on it, but I'm out of salt. I've all things to be out of too.I know like I had a huge, [...0.4s] well, I had two huge bags. I had a huge bag of pink Himalayan salt that I've had for five years that ran out recently. Then I had a box of diamond kosher salt that just I was on, like I knew I was gonna run out. I was in like my last jar full of it and I've been meaning to get the Baja mineral salts and I can order on Amazon for$30 or I can go drive to Whole Foods and pay$13.So [...0.4s] like waiting until I will be near a Whole Foods, wait, Bezos has got the corner on this, you know, I wonder if that somewhere we can get Detroit salt. Oh, yeah, they, I think they do sell it locally. Why have I never seen this? I watched a couple of videos about this recently.Editors note, I wonder if you'll be able to hear the fact the HVAC just turned off back to Joshua. Huh, um, yeah we should do that. I'm sure they must sell it here, although I think it's mostly, I don't know if it's food grade anymore.I think it's mostly used to salt the roads and for commercial applications, but [...0.8s] it's got to be here somewhere I'm sure.Anyway, all right, here we go. Little look out, tap here. Yeah, [...0.7s] it's, oh, it's not, like, it's oh, it's ganache on top, oh, it's ganache and, like, there's every kind of coconut milk and coconut oil in here. Like, [...0.6s] it's a total like Gen Z vegan recipe.It does look it does look good we definitely have some ganache going on. [...3.7s] Alright, I'm gonna come back to the chocolate. I'm gonna go right to the pudding and see what happens here. [...3.1s]Score good job, Gen Z person, I don't know where you got that balayage done, but looks great, tastes great, 10 out of 10.It was, I didn't have agave syrup or maple syrup, um, so I use, um, I intended to use pin on seal, but that's a bit of an operation, so how do you know that is and up with brown sugar?It's a, it's a Mexican it's like a little block. It's an unprocessed sugar that, that seems even more hipster than whatever the Gen Z [...0.7s] person said. It's not, it's like authentic and ancient, and, yeah, [...0.5s] right next to tofu. [...1.3s]I'm not mad at this at all I'm not mad at this at all I like to know, I don't know that. I want to read that, you know, nutritional facts on the side.But [...0.8s] no, it's not low calorie by any means. But, um, [...0.5s] I mean other than the sweetener, what's in this [...0.9s] tofu, [...0.4s] um, with this firm tofu or silky tofu, soft tofu soft tofu. Um well, then it's a tofu peanut butter.Oh, it needs a bit of cinnamon. I don't want cinnamon in those. Oh, cinnamon, you wouldn't even know it was in there, [...0.8s] and it definitely needs salt. My [...1.1s] hate relationship with cinnamon right now is that cocoa, if you haven't paid attention to the global cocoa train. Are you talking about our friend Cody?Or, um, uh, no the delicious chocolatey powder, they could be the same depending on the day, or could be a bitter piece of shit depending on the day.Uh, when I have had I've always done protein drinks, and recently cocoa powder has been extraordinarily expensive, and is not even available at my local Aldi store [...0.6s] recently.So I've been doing a lot more cinnamon, nutmeg stuff. And cinnamon nutmeg kale is not something I can put together. So I may have ruined my cinnamon things until PSL season comes back around. Maybe you did too much nutmeg because nutmeg is very [...0.5s] powerful, it is, [...0.4s] especially the fresh stuff. [...2.6s]I would only I would add some salt well, I think it's basically, it was like tofu peanut butter sugar [...2.2s] and then, um, oh, I remember it called for vanilla extract, which I like never keep in the house anymore. Because whiskey is basically [...0.6s] a similar yet better flavor.I like the whiskey in it. [...1.7s] Hmm, yeah, 10 out of 10, [...1.3s] yeah, oats flavors, yum, and try to figure out how to make a low calorie. [...1.3s]I mean, [...1.5s] I feel like you just substitute stevia [...0.7s] for [...1.0s] the, I've always found that [...1.1s] stevia, like 3 quarter stevia to 1/4, whatever the actual sweetener is, especially if it's brown sugar, like, how little bit of the molasses thing going on? I do have some monk fruit sweetener.Yeah, it's pretty much tasteless. I went to had a friend um, [...0.5s] I went to their Christmas party, [...0.6s] and they said Spencer, come to the kitchen. I was like, okay, so I came to the kitchen and they [...0.4s] said, I have a Christmas present for you.I said what? And they opened up their pantry, and they pulled out a 5 gallon [...1.0s] or 5 pound bag of monk fruit, handed it to me.I said [...1.0s] thanks context, and the answer was, yeah, I got this because I wanted to try low calorie baking, and it's been in my pantry now for a year and a half, and I decided that I'm not going to use it because I used it once and I don't like it and your health not.So here you go. It's like [...0.8s] giving people presents that you already have in your house, like not that you bought specifically for them. I'm great with this [...0.5s] and by the way, way better Christmas gift than so any other Christmas gifts I've gotten. [...1.1s]True, I do tend to like food as gifts or consumables because I don't really need [...0.5s] the stuff that I like want that, you know, like headphones and like clothes and whatever. Like I'm really particular about. And I already basically have [...0.5s] everything I want because when I like want something, I just buy it. Uh huh, um so I particularly [...0.5s] appreciate food gifts, especially like little gourmet ish thingies. Um, I don't know what I like for gifts these days.I've been really into experiences recently. And that is such a millennial thing to say [...0.7s] or Gen Z thing to say, which is like [...0.5s] something that I wanted to go do that I was never going to do by myself, but I would totally do with somebody else.But I'm also not going to arrange like going to the rock climbing gym or going to a pole dancing lesson or something which I wanted to do but have not done. And I'm now kind of checking it off my list, having experience doing with a friend.Okay, [...0.5s] I've been having experiences since long before you were born, and let me tell you experiences, other way to go. [...1.4s] The experience has been positive with our tofu. We have another one here, try.We do. Okay, so we have another tofu pudding. This one I just made up based on the fact that I'm growing some shiso in my garden.Comment if you know what she show is, I did not know what she show was it's a Japanese, uh, it's, it's the Japanese flavor. Um, it's like in it's sort of minty, but it's got a bit of Tang to it. I've loved it. Like, um, a really popular one would be Mishi Somaki.It's like a sushi roll with, uh, plum [...0.4s] or like sour plum, like Mabel, she [...0.5s] kind of like sour plum and then the, she so leaf and then, you know, rice and then naughty.The fact that you know what all of those words mean means that this is probably dead. Also, do I have putting in my beard? I tend to have [...0.4s] get putting my beard.Oh, amazingly no, what, huh, it's the Christmas miracle [...0.5s] now. I really like this pudding, so this one I totally did off the coffee. I just made it up.Yeah, close up for the camera here. Um, oh, yeah, so if you can get, you can see the little bits of she's so in there. It looks identical to like a vegetable ranch dip.Like if I walked up to a plate of, [...0.7s] of [...0.4s] I got rotate spoons. [...1.3s] I like that it's in Congress. [...2.1s] The, the takeaway is good if you could, like, it leaves the divot, it has the like stiff peaks, [...0.5s] whipping eggs, [...5.1s] needs an acid [...1.0s] and some like lemon or lime. It's lime.Yeah, we can, [...0.4s] I saw that. Hold on, we'll be back, [...0.5s] this commercial break brought to you by, [...1.0s] it's not bad. It was still eat it, but, yeah, there's [...0.6s] we had some lime juice.I don't know that it needs acid actually. [...1.6s] Um, [...0.4s] oh actually no, it needs, it needs fat I think it needs fat yeah I think it's because we had the peanut butter has a lot of fat in it from the Reese's.Yes, one here, let's try a little, [...1.0s] nothing will cow taste good. She's, that's a lie, [...3.7s] fat is important, that's a good flavor. I think the fat sort of, like, replaces the tofu flavor. [...1.5s] I think it gives, like, pudding for me is about the creaminess.Hmm, [...0.6s] I think it needs something in the creamy department too. I think it needs, like, some [...0.4s] cornstarch, cornstarch or herb powder or something to like Santa gum or something, yeah, even just stirring it. The stirring is, like, very [...0.8s] noticeably different than they. Hmm, [...0.8s] yeah, it's better with lime, like, you, the lime, [...0.6s] yeah, [...0.5s] little more.I agree, and he's like [...0.6s] lime peel, like lime zest. Yeah, I'm going with ain'ts fat, [...1.0s] so which basically means [...1.3s] that you're not low calorie oil. Yeah, where it's gonna then it's gonna be coconut oil.It's gonna add some coconut ishness in oil news. I was at Aldi this weekend, and I realized that, uh, [...0.9s] olive oil is now almost double the price of avocado oil, [...0.6s] really.Yeah, a bottle of olive oil was like nine dollars and seventy nine cents, and the same bottle of avocado oil [...0.6s] was less than$5. And I'm not quite sure what world we're living in that that is the reality of things. [...1.3s] I'm sure there's a lot of reasons, but that's actually fine. Like I use a lot of avocado oil, like the only thing I use olive oil for a salads basically.Yeah, I think I only use [...1.1s] and I've been using that [...0.5s] oil spritzers. You have an oil spritzer? I do. I use [...0.4s] way less oil when I use an oil spritzer. It's how I stay trim. It's less Weight Watchers points if you have a spritzer. [...1.4s] One spritz is 5 points, but one tablespoon is 10 points. That's why I always spritz my oil [...0.7s] link in bio to find your spritzer. So it is that reminds me of, um, have we watched Little Britain together? I don't think we have, no, but I do love Little Britain.Oh, you know Little Britain? I do know Little Britain, [...0.4s] a TV show that you know what is going on. I do know that one, also Derby Girls, [...0.9s] I don't know you haven't seen Derby girls. My last partner and I watched that religiously together, it was so good. [...1.0s] Um, [...0.7s] okay, I think I'm gonna finish the pudding tomorrow cause I'm also like [...0.5s] rather full.It's a good dinner, it's also not amazing peanut butter one was like, amazing, yeah, sure, I think it's because I'm not, I'm not familiar with she so as a flavor that I'm having a hard time placing that. Well, we also had she, so he does, [...0.9s] which is, um, a mojito.Well, I didn't have any lime, so we just use lime juice, but it's basically muddled shiso, what is usually muddled in a mojito?It's usually just, oh, mint, mint, so this was muddled shiso, [...0.7s] uh, bit of lime juice, soda water, and then, [...0.5s] oh, it's over there. Um, some rum that I got when I was in Puerto Rico, which was, like, two jobs ago.And it's, um, dongcu, which looks like Don Q to Americans, but it's actually dongcu [...0.4s] and this passion fruit flavor, and it is [...1.0s] still, I don't know that I've ever had a bad which was passion fruit flavor.Yeah, it's a good, like, it's got that nice, like tartan, is it pretty much compliments everything. Okay, next tofu, let's do passion fruit tofu, passion fruit tofu. Okay let's see, we get another one [...0.5s] expanding on the [...0.5s] tofu pudding category that will be like a next culinary experiment.Toto, the tofu weans after organ. So now I'm like recalling topics from the previous Throw Away podcast that we actually had to throw away. That's true. And I still haven't done your eyebrows. [...1.9s] So I think my beard and my eyebrows are clearly in need of help. Yes, we should do eyebrows.Okay, now that they've grown back because they were shaved off for a while. Yeah, that was when you had no eyebrows.Yes, [...0.6s] yeah, I had no eyebrows for a while, which funny enough, I shaved off my eyebrows many reasons, but the primary reason was people would say to me, you don't look autistic. And so I got so ticked off. I'm like shaved off my eyebrows because I'm like, what does autism look like? Does this what it looks like at people?Ironically enough for like, yeah, you do look more autistic now. I'm like, so you think we look like aliens.Okay, [...0.5s] but I have now heard from a growing number of autistic people that they are been hearing this exact question. And several of other people independently of me have also shaved their eyebrows off, really for the exact same reason. So just to look more autistic.Not to because they wanted to look more autistic, but it was kind of a big fu to everybody who is saying this out loud, which is you're saying dumb shit. Let me [...1.5s] play the game here.I don't know if, like, I can't think of how autistic people look. I'm trying to think of a characteristic those people might be thinking of, like down syndrome, or something that's more physically apparent. And maybe they're not clear on what autism is.I don't have any answer to what other people are thinking. I just know that I hear it, and I'm tired of hearing it so often. The eyebrows. Okay, so, yeah, let's, let's do your eyebrows. Actually, I just ordered a magnifying lighted mirror. Um, there's one of my hotel room and I would you like AARP discount on that one?No, why would I? I feel like that's something people who with an AARP membership would have. No, I think it's something that like makeup fanatics, and it's good for shaving, like, it's good for eyebrows.I think it's mostly for makeup. I think that's, like the primary [...0.9s] sales point. Um, [...0.6s] yeah, so there's one in the hotel, and, like, I used it to do my eyebrows and, like, doing things zoomed in and then zooming out. It looks so good, [...0.5s] and there's no zoom in, zoom out Joshua's eyebrows.Yeah they're not Spencer's eyebrows or break the lens. I probably, you know, that was, I probably introduce them right now. It's probably a little bit off, but, um, [...0.6s] yeah, they look really good after I did that. So [...1.2s] apparently, I don't know eyebrows very well, [...2.1s] you [...1.0s] anyway. Um, [...0.7s] so, okay, so on the topic of autism and eyebrows, [...1.6s] not so much eyebrows anymore.So I have found out that [...0.8s] over [...0.8s] the past year or so, especially since I met Spencer, so he's been sort of the autism champion [...1.0s] and like I might not look autistic, but apparently I'm the autism champion. Like meaning he's like sort of championed it or like you know, taught me a lot about it and, [...0.4s] um, just sort of like made it, [...0.5s] uh, it was invisible and now it's sort of like fizzed into view. Are you kidding me?I don't talk about anything other than regulating my nervous system these days. You do talk about that like kind of a lot.I do I do talk about that kind of a lot because it is kind of the main thing about having autism these days, right? Um. But so since then, um, [...0.6s] and another one came to light this week, I realized that there's been a lot of people in my life that I've been very close to that have been autistic.And, um, like, I won't name names because not everybody wants to readily identify. But, um, [...0.5s] yeah, like one, like a [...0.4s] very close uh, you know, friends, family members, co workers across that.I'd say about [...0.7s] with one that I just found out about, um, six people, like, that have been very close to me that are, [...0.5s] that are autistic.And, um so, kind of made me wonder, like, what like, what is that? Like, what's the connection? Like why is that like a normal number of autistic people to have been close to in your life or, [...0.6s] um, [...0.7s] yeah, like, why are there so many autistic people and what's that mean about you?Yeah, I know, right, so that's like the natural thing. It's like life attracts, like, like obviously there's a lot of gay people around me. There's a lot of like Buddhists around me. There's a lot of fashion people around that, fashion people anymore.There used to be a lot of fashion people around me when I was. Where are your fashion between you? Is it New York recently been talking about needing to add another human to your social group to get around things out? Do we need to go find you a fashion gay? [...1.5s]I think, I guess there's fashion gays in Detroit. Yeah, there are definitely gays in Detroit. I don't know. I feel like my interest, in fact, I mean, I still am interested in fashion but, like, [...0.4s] caring enough to expand my closet or, like, research designers that might be a past version of me.Okay, um, [...0.5s] but, uh, [...0.5s] what was I saying oh, yeah, so you, you, kind of attract the people around you that you are. You become the people that you're around. So, I mean, that didn't make me wonder, and like, I took a couple tests online, and I scored super low on the autism spectrum.Um, and also listening to people's experience of what it's like to be autistic. Um, you know, having memories of being young and learning how to make eye contact or, you know, consciously [...0.7s] realizing somewhere along the way or someone telling them that's not the way to make eye contact and learning how to do that or [...0.4s] learning how to pick up on social cues or, um, [...0.7s] you know, like constantly [...1.7s] there's one more that was in the front of my mind. I just forgot it. But [...0.4s] yeah, I'd like, I didn't have any of those experiences.I think [...1.0s] there's like kind of an anxiety or social thing that comes with it. May I think I have normal, a normal amount of anxiety or angst about interacting with people. Um, I don't think I have any sensory issues.I do in extreme situations like when, you know, when I'm traveling and I'm like waiting for a flight and at the airport and [...0.6s] airports are loud man, there's, yeah, all these announcements and there's bright lights and there's a ton of people and everybody else's [...0.7s] nervous system is disregulated because they're moving all over the place.Yeah. So I feel a little bit off in those situations, but I'm not sure if that's the same as like what an autistic person would experience, but I definitely feel like, I think I'm already tired and then all of this like extra like the lights in the sounds like that it makes me feel a bit frazzled. But I don't think that's out of the ordinary.Yeah. It's interesting to bring this up because earlier this week I got a text message from my mother with an article in the New York Times talking about how [...0.4s] we've seen this explosion in autism recently and whether or not this is just a change in the diagnostic criteria because of cell phones. It's cell phones.Hey, I gotta tell you my EMS story because I'm not putting myself out of my pocket anymore. Uh, or the vaccine. Shout out to whoever our new department of Human Health RFK.Hey, thank you. We're getting rid of the autisms now apparently with that, which is creepy what he's doing. But we'll come back to that some other podcast, I'll forget about that. Or if it's just more people having access to these things. And so we were able to have a conversation. My mother is a therapist for, uh, contextual information. And I said a couple things.The first thing I said is that historically, like autism was named by a guy in Austria many years ago and he was finding that people in his insane asylum were, there's a certain type of person who is [...0.6s] exhibiting certain [...1.0s] traits which were not like the pre diagnosed psychiatric conditions that he had seen and needed to come up with a new term for it.So it came up for this, this new [...0.5s] term for it. And that term is then been [...0.7s] codified in the DSM5.Well, DSM, I think we started it, I don't know what time, yeah, what it came around. We're at 5 now, but I don't know what it was when he came up with it, but it was in 3 and four. Now we're at 5 and every time it changes.And if you read the DSM5, which I did, [...0.7s] it lists out certain criteria and the criteria include starting at birth because we know autism is mostly genetic at this point, you can't catch it. It's not communicable. And thank God. Well, that's something. [...1.7s] Take that one.No, no, take that one. Just go. Keep going because that's horrible. Just gonna keep going.Listen, I mean, is I don't think it's communicable. Because now I know that I've been around so many autistic [...0.4s] for so long. I feel like as a gay person, you should know that, that feels, yeah, yeah, gay, gay disease might be communicable. [...1.1s]And the [...0.9s] criteria was mostly defined by old white rich establishment who had went to an Ivy League institution for a very long time. And it was mostly [...0.9s] not, [...0.9s] there was no [...0.5s] input given by people who actually living with autism on what it felt like to be autistic.Rather it was [...0.5s] how do we as diagnosticians find this thing? And when you read it, which you'll essentially read is nine to 10 [...0.6s] ways that a person engages in the world or challenges they have in the world.And what you also notice is that a lot of these items have to deal with social structures and they also have to do with the nervous system or the sensory system. And [...0.5s] the comments I was having in my mother about this explosion and people being diagnosed is No.1. For a very long time it was believed that women could not have autism. And now that [...0.6s] correct, that stigma is being broken, we're find that women have autism maybe less than men do because there's genetic component, but [...0.7s] certainly can have autism.So there's a huge amount of women being diagnosed with autism now because they probably already had it, but they were not considered eligible for the diagnosis for a long time. [...1.4s]You know, how hard must it be to have been a woman throughout the years? Like yeah, you couldn't vote, you couldn't own property you couldn't be autistic. Like, [...0.8s] like what we've just been holding back all these things from women. Like, uh huh, it's crazy.Well, it's funny to hear these late diagnosed autistic women [...0.6s] say, this just explains my entire life.And the fact that they probably had psychiatric examinations in their life at some point in time and they met all the criteria but simply because they didn't have a y chromosome, they didn't qualify. You're like this. What kind of world are we living in?The others change recently has been, it was thought that you could not have both ADHD and autism. They were seen as mutually contradictory ideas or other ends of the spectrum.Turns out that's not the case either. You can be autistic and have ADHD. And there's a term for that which is ADHD, [...0.8s] of course, [...0.7s] which you can have both of them [...0.6s] at the same time.So [...0.5s] maybe this has to do with the changing [...0.5s] criteria that's happening. And yeah, the feedback from autistic people but also from, [...0.6s] uh, individuals which are not just old white, rich Ivy League educated men having a say in what the diagnostic criteria is.I think mental health things are less stigmatized and more, you know, talked about, which is good. Um, they will say that.Um, one thing [...0.6s] like I was talking with, um, a friend about this that I recently found out. And [...0.8s] like we're saying, it seems that it's mostly [...0.6s] revolves around like society and this concept of society.And let's say there's like, and I think this might be where I kind of do relate to people with autism. So it seems like they're just not meant to be.Like if it's like an 80, 20 thing and 80% of people sort of fit into society and 20% of people don't do [...0.5s] what they're supposed to and do expectations and, you know, have a regular 9 to 5 job and, you know, like have two kids and, [...0.4s] you know buy the things are supposed to and be good consumers.And like I definitely feel like, [...0.8s] especially now, like I feel like I'm not interacting with society and like a very typical way like I can [...0.8s] and I have, [...0.5s] but I just don't feel like.I think it's kind of about like figuring out what do you [...0.4s] want, like what makes you happy [...0.5s] and then [...1.1s] sort of [...0.5s] how do you do that?And then how do you, society is pretty much present wherever you are, so how do you engage with that if it's not, [...1.0s] if you don't like kind of want the same things and feel the same happiness as everyone else does, right? So like lately, [...1.3s] gosh, I keep burping, I, what can we get the tofu?It's the tofu mode, [...0.6s] so many vegetables and then we have tofu and anyway, the fiber. Um, so, uh, yeah, so you kind of figure out, so now I'm like, I'm feel like I'm not so into like work make money, take vacations, like buy a bigger house.Like I feel like I, [...0.6s] I was always a little bit of the weird one, like, you know, I always wanted to like have plants in my house and like what, maybe I don't need to use shampoo on my hair, like what, like just a questioning like those really basic things and figuring out like really basic stuff. Um.But yes, I think now it's like even more pronounced. I don't [...0.8s] definitely don't have a regular job.I'm not interested in, [...0.4s] uh, you know, making more money and buying a nicer car and buying a bigger house and, [...0.6s] you know, much more happy to have some time like I need to be creative. That makes me feel happy and fulfilled. Any other takes a couple forms. Like cooking, gardening, like building house stuff, writing, music. Like there's a few forms that takes, for me, [...0.4s] um, we have that is a lot more important than [...0.5s] making money and being in that part of society. So I think and that way, like the way that I'm kind of interacting with society is a bit different than most people. So I think I can relate in that way. Um.And also like you said, we're talking about cultural things and you said something like being autistic is [...0.9s] sort of like always feeling [...0.7s] culturally lost.So people are telling you [...0.4s] like you feel that you should interact in a certain way and you do that, then people say, no, it's not supposed to be like that. So then you update your perception and then you try to act like that and the next time that comes up, it's still wrong [...0.7s] and like on and on and on.So I think you said something like, it's just that you own, you never feel [...0.4s] comfortable or that you know what to do. And every time you have an interaction, it [...0.5s] sort of is a source of anxiety or [...0.8s] it's not gonna be correct.And that I can relate to too, because that's how I felt living in Japan, yeah, all the time. Yeah, cause Japan is a total one 80 from a lot of things in America. And, and you had tell the watchers about your [...0.6s] experience in Japan. So you lived in Japan for 11 years.Yeah, so lived in Tokyo for 11 years. Yeah, um, [...0.5s] yeah, I can speak Japanese, but even though I can speak the language, it doesn't mean that I have the same [...0.4s] cultural background.Um, you know, obviously like they grew up, you know even if someone who's the same age like someone in Japan would have grown up [...0.4s] with different TV shows and different cultural reference points and obviously different values. And, um, [...0.6s] yeah, like it's, you know, sort of like I always felt like I was trying to [...0.9s] act out, act that way and fit in more um, partially because I didn't wanna be [...0.6s] that, uh, like that trope of, [...0.5s] you know, the American who [...1.1s] like doesn't even try to learn Japanese or doesn't try to be part of society, the one that's just like, I'm gonna be in [...0.5s] expat lander English, which is fine, like there's nothing wrong with that, but like I just didn't wanna like to me that sort of a stereotype and I don't wanna be part of that.Oh, well, see a recurring theme. Haha. I, I think I'm actually contrarian. I think you might be, yeah, I think you could be, this is, I like this word, this is a new word contrarian.Yeah, I think I didn't, I'd heard it before, but I didn't really like understand what it meant. Um, [...0.8s] now I do. There was one of those CNBC videos about now I live.I used to, I'm American and now I live here. And there is this guy who started a Mexican restaurant in India [...0.5s] and he described himself as contrary. And he's like, most people come to India and they kind of freak out and it's so different and they get overwhelmed. And I thought, this is great, I wanna be here more.Haha. He's like, [...0.4s] and he described himself as contrary and I'm like, oh, that's what that means. Um, and I also have this very specific memory of that word.Um, I used to work at, [...0.5s] maybe I shouldn't say this in case somebody who's like gonna maybe hire me for something is gonna look at my resume and not see this and they're gonna think my resume is a lie. Haha, how many years ago was this? Uh, [...1.7s] am I supposed to say the real number? [...2.1s] Okay, I'm gonna redirect the topic. [...1.2s]Alright. So [...0.5s] I, when you are kind of coming to this realization that many of your friends are autistic, which actually shout out to anybody watching this, if you have more than 50 friends, probably at least one of them is autistic like by statistical odds.And it's likely they may not be willing to share that because autism still comes with a huge stigma.So I think that would be the first kind of comment I would have here, which is [...0.5s] it's possible that a lot of these people you've known have been experiencing autism their entire life, but either just because they've become aware of it through changing diagnostics or increase access to mental health care or decreasing national health, mental health statistics, [...0.5s] uh, that or willingness to just speak about it publicly.I think like the first comment here is that do you feel [...0.6s] that when you engaged with these people that your engagement shifts in any meaningful way, or are there like aha moments real like, ah, that kind of actually makes sense. There's definitely a helmets like most of these people I have.Like it's like the reason that it's remarkable for me is that I haven't felt [...1.4s] either haven't noticed it or don't feel like I interact with these people [...0.4s] any differently than I do with [...0.7s] other people.Like I'm not treating them specially or giving them any kind of [...0.6s] extra consideration or anything like that. It's like very natural interactions except for one, [...0.8s] maybe, maybe two. Um, I'm definitely one of the two.No. Like I think, I think interaction with you feels very like natural for me. Um, which is like a comment I frequently make like you're having autistic things. And I'm like, [...1.4s] I'm not feeling anything weird. Like I feel like we're interacting in a normal way.Um, so anyway, but, yeah, so two of them, like when I feel like a little bit of like, [...0.7s] I think it's called geeku Shaku in Japanese. It's like when things like a little bit of social, like when your comments just sort of like miss a little bit or sure just something's up.So I pick that up, but I wouldn't have guessed that they were autistic until they actually [...0.9s] let it slip. And it was a very like sideways comment. And I was like, [...0.4s] okay, some of the stuff makes sense.And then another, another one [...0.6s] does not, I has, does not have awareness. Like I've sort of figured it out specifically because they were in difficult to interact with. [...1.0s]And so, [...0.8s] yeah, so, but I'd say four out of the six people that I've been very close to in my life, I haven't picked it up. I've just like kind of enjoyed them. And, you know, the quirks and the [...0.4s] personality things like were a good match. So that's what it was. Um, yeah.So not always apparent, but [...0.6s] after someone tells me, then I can go back and say, oh, like, [...0.7s] yeah, there's definitely some things that are different about you. Like those work well with me and [...0.4s] but, oh, I guess those would be the traits. Yeah, that makes sense.Yeah. I think that really brings up this idea of, so I was diagnosed with Asperger's, which is now an out of [...0.8s] vogue term. And now the in vogue term is autism spectrum disorder.Which I hate the title, uh, for many reason. And but [...0.5s] one of the reasons [...0.4s] that I think it is helpful in some ways is it really reminds us that [...0.8s] autism is a very, very big spectrum.And then she have people which are [...0.9s] unable to speak or unable to process or unable to engage with life in a way which maybe they would like to, or it's very crippling and it is very disabling.And then you have other people on the other end of the spectrum who are what you might call like passable as, quote unquote, normal people.And [...0.6s] the another problem with this term for me is that it's not a spectrum. It is [...0.6s] dozens and dozens of dozens of individual spectrums. And autism expresses in so many different ways and that some people might be, you know, very extreme on these areas but very minimal on these other areas over here. So it's not really a very clear [...0.6s] diagnostic [...0.4s] approach here, I think